Struggling

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  • #1450
    luka_dawson
    Spectator

      Hi all

      I’m not sure how many of you know but I am nearly 20 weeks pregnant. Only one baby this time and everything is going well so far. I’m under Mr Aldrich and have seen him 3 times already.

      Everything has been going just lovely and I was feeling very positive until now!!!
      The last few days I have been extremely short tempered and feel agitated all of the time. I’m arguing with Ross about everything, he must be about ready to strangle me.
      I’m also getting a lot of headaches not too severe but just there and annoying. I am also getting niggly pains and cramps low in my tummy and back. They are not severe at all and I’m pretty sure they’re just normal stretching aches but I am very good at letting them really worry me.

      Work is a nightmare at the minute as we are hugely understaffed and busy and to top it all off we are having to apply for our own jobs and my interview is next week. There is not really a risk of redundancy but I could be down banded which would mean slightly less pay (but also less responsibity). I’m not too worried about it to be honest but it is hard not to be affected by it.

      I think subconsciously I am more worried about approaching 22 weeks, which is when I lost the girls, than I imagined I would be. I don’t want to keep ringing the midwife when I’m not really sure if anything is really wrong!!

      I’m sorry for the negativity, I guess I just need someone who’s been there to tell me that I’m not completely mad and that I’m worrying over nothing 🙁

      M x

      #2080

      Hi Michelle,

      I am sorry to here you are having such a rough time as you approach the 22 weeks 🙁 .

      I think you have every right to be worried about every niggle and pain you get, I know I worried as the weeks went on and I am sure your midwife wouldn’t mind in the least you giving her a call just for a bit of reassurance knowing what your history is.

      For me Jane Percival (the bereavement midwife) was a god send and I could ring her at anytime, she also arranged a couple of my ctg monitoring appt’s so you could always ring her if you needed. Have you had any contact with her in the past? I have her number if you need it.

      With your job, it is just something you could do without dealing at this stressful enough time and i hope it turns out for the better, which ever way that may be for you.

      Mark said I was always moody and a bit doollally with all 3 of my pregnancies and got worse with each one and this time he wrote wife back on my calendar the day that Daisy was due by c section 😆 . I am sure Ross fully understands as I should imagine he has his own worries and ways of dealing with them.

      Take care of yourself and put yourself and the baby first and do what you need to! 🙂

      Carla
      xxx

      #2081
      Anonymous

        Hi Michelle

        I did suspect that you might be pregnant as I thought it could have been you in the waiting room at the Maternity Day Unit ages ago when I was there to see Mr Aldrich. I didn’t approach you as we haven’t really met properly, so I was not 100% sure, & I didn’t want to intrude either!

        Your feelings are totally normal & understandable. I was a nervous wreck when I was pregnant with Evie and as I approached 24 weeks, the stage we lost Grace, I had to be signed off work with anxiety. I didn’t return! I did laugh at Carla’s comment about “Wife back” on the calendar. Geoff keeps saying the same to me & it’s even worse now I’m a prisoner in NGH. Even having had a totally normal, but very anxious pregnancy last time, I found myself becoming anxious again as I approached 24 weeks in this one. The problems I’m having now are unrelated & I think I’m just very unlucky!

        Don’t be afraid to contact your midwife if you need reassurance, better that than worry, and as Carla said use Jane Pervival too. I’m sure she will happily organise for you to visit MDU for monitoring. It’s going to be an anxious time but you will get there. I hope that when you get past 22 weeks you can start to relax a little. Mr Aldrich is lovely and you are in safe hands with him. My regular appointments & reassurance from him helped me get through my pregnancy with Evie, and now with this cheeky boy.

        Try not to worry about work too much. I think they have to be careful with redundancy when you are pregnant! What’s important is looking after you & your precious little one.

        Fingers crossed for you & keep talking to us.

        Max, x

        #2082
        jaydens-mummy
        Spectator

          Hi Michelle,
          Firstly congratulations on your fantastic news.
          Try and relax and rest when you can, everything you are feeling is perfectly normal. The pains I’m sure are ligaments stretching as yourmy tummy is starting to increase, the dull headaches and feeling uptight will be change in hormones. Being frightened as you approach 22 weeks is normal huni, take good care of yourself and if you get too worried get someone medically to check you over, that’s what they are there for.

          Please let me know if we can help and if you’re passing come in and see me and Clare and have a cuppa and a chin wag

          Lots of love xxxx

          #2083

          Hi Michelle

          Sorry hear you are having a rough time n sorry you couldn’t make it for lunch last week we could have had a good old chat about symptoms etc as I too am 22 weeks now, but of course it is normal to get anxious I did with Lexi and chose to pay for a scan to reassure myself that all was ok I also asked for a scan everytime I had a consultant appt too so don’t be afraid to ask for what you want the reassurance is worth all the awkwardness you may feel in asking.
          As for mood swings I am queen if them too poor Jim doesn’t know what to say for the best sometimes I swear I still get pmt even without the periods lol.
          Try not to worry about work too much I know it is easier said than done but if it is too much take some time off and chill out this little one is very precious so take care of you both.
          Have you had your anomaly scan yet and did you find out if its pink or blue?

          Keep your chin up Hun and like Max said keep talking to us and if you fancy a catch up sometime just give me a shout.

          Take care

          Becs xxx

          #2084
          Pork Chops
          Spectator

            Aww Michelle, I can’t imagine what you are going through 🙁 but like the other ladies have said I’m sure you feelings are only natural, yeah the tummy pains are probably stretching but any reassurance you need just get from your midwife and consultant 🙂 sending you lots of love Sarah x

            #2085
            luka_dawson
            Spectator

              Thank you everyone x
              I have spoken to Jane and she has reassured me on my niggles and it was her who suggested that I speak to you guys.
              When I think rationally I know it is to be expected and that my hormones are everywhere but that doesn’t happen very often and then I start to think that something is really wrong or that I’m going completely mental.

              The week before I lost the girls I was in and out of hospital a couple of times and I really felt like I was a burden and just being neurotic. Everytime I spoke to anyone they always asked if it was my first pregnancy and when I said yes you could almost hear them sighing, never mind the fact it was twins and I was supposed to be high risk!!! They just stuck me on a bed and left me to it. The day before I actually delivered I sat on Robert Watson from from 10am until 9pm and didn’t have my obs done or speak to anyone all day. Obviously I am a lot wiser this time and wouldn’t let that happen but it does play on my mind.

              I am feeling better today, especially after all your supportive comments, although I’m sure I’ll be back on here stressing again in the very near future 🙄

              M x

              #2086
              Pork Chops
              Spectator

                Michelle what ever you going through we are here 🙂 please remember this 🙂 the next couple of weeks are going to be hard for you but if your struggling just pick up the phone, lots of love x

                #2087
                nickinoo
                Spectator

                  hey Michelle

                  Im really sorry to hear your having a hard time but so understandable as you are coming up to 22 weeks. Its a strange old time being pregnant again i found, i was so grateful and pleased to be pregnant but incredibly worried, scared and anxious. looking back at my pregnancy with lulah i cant really remember it as i just wanted to get through it.

                  Take as many scans as you can and if you are worried speak to jane or your midwife as you will only worry until you know everything is ok.

                  take care and hope to see you soon.

                  Michelle. xx

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