Children Are Butterflies › Butterflies Gathering – Discussion Groups and Forums › Butterflies Gathering › WEDNESDAY … is Thoughts Day!! › Feeling wobbly today!
July 18, 2012 at 9:33 pm #1419
Seen as its Wednesday I thought I’d post in here as today has been full of ups and downs with a variety of thoughts. I have tried to go back to work and stay as busy and distracted as possible but today a colleague brought her new born to work and I had a wobble. I didn’t want to purposefully avoid her, as I want to be positive around my friends with new borns, but it was the thought of everybody else looking at me and seeing how I reacted. I therefore avoided the situation and hid away 🙁 . It’s only been 10 and a half weeks since we lost Eva and its still so raw. People’s expectations are high and it’s sometimes just so hard to live up to them.
Laura xJuly 19, 2012 at 6:53 am #1837Anonymous
You are very brave being back at work & trying to deal with these emotions. The loss of Eva is, as you say, still so raw. I’m not surprised you had a wobble seeing a newborn. I was off work for 9 months, I think, after losing Grace. It may have been longer. I found the return difficult, especially people’s reaction to me, many not knowing we had lost Grace and asking what I had had, or why I’d been off work so long.
As for pregnancies & new babies, I was a wreck. I remember one week, almost 6 months after losing Grace when I’d found out several friends were pregnant and on hearing the latest, my sister in law, I sat down and sobbed. When the babies arrived, the tears came some more. It’s hard & unfortunately I don’t know of any way to ease the pain, other than time. I promise it does get easier.
Take care & cry if you need to. I think it’s the best therapy!
Max, xJuly 20, 2012 at 10:05 pm #1838Pork ChopsSpectator
Oh yes I can also so relate to your feelings, Yes You’ve been really good going back to work this early on, and things like this will keep cropping up and you will be stronger each time you come across it.
Your feelings are only natural…..and yeah as Max said just deal with it the best you can, if you wanna hide from the newborn, thats fine!!!
Theres no wrong or right way for you to handle situations. If you wanna cry, they just let it out.
Hope you are feeling better,
Sarah xJuly 21, 2012 at 5:59 pm #1839
Thank you Max and Sarah. Your supportive comments are very comforting. I’m now off work for 6 weeks as I’m a teacher so I can hopefully just focus on getting to Eva’s due date and take each day at a time. I’m sorry for your losses too and hope our butterflies are together in the sunshine. Thank you again xJuly 25, 2012 at 7:03 pm #1840nickinooSpectator
I think what you are feeling is prefectly normal and your doing really well being back at work so soon.
Don’t be so hard on yourself and take one day at a time, people don’t always understand or don’t even want to as people find it to hard to even think about the loss of a baby/child.
We are all here whenever you are having a wobble.
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